Two weeks ago I ended up in the ER with debilitating chest pain and left arm numbness. Combined with battling fatigue and nausea all week, I presented all the signs of a woman having a heart attack. I was released but was ordered to get a heart stress test.
Here is how it went:
Oh I have to run topless so you can hook up all the machinery for this test? Great. #painfulheartstressporn
“Due to your age and health history we are going to go ahead and start you off on a higher level. Otherwise we will be here all day.”
They have to crank it up 5 levels after that to get my heart rate up.
“Ok you are doing amazing. In fact if you make it past 12 minutes at this pace you will beat our current record. Currently held by a man. So if you want to beat a man…”
Oh wow this doctor has apparently not ridden with Justin and his competitive girlfriend. It’s on record holder!
I beat his record and keep running.
A few minutes later, Cardiologist turns to tech, “I’ve never seen anyone make it to this level. Have you?”
It then became they didn’t need me to run anymore but encouraged me to keep going because they were fascinated by what I was doing. They were impressed that I wasn’t even red faced.
Finally I decided to stop. The cardiologist thanked me multiple times and said that was very fun to see.
Probable diagnosis? ACID REFLUX.
If you need me I will be eating a tums and riding my bike.